"Shore Leave"

by DJ Clawson

First draft - 4/27/98
Final draft - 10/6/98

Edited by Rygar 12/25/03

SCENE 1 - THE RIGHTEOUS INDIGNATION

	CAPTAIN BUCKY O'HARE and FIRST MATE JENNY sit casually in the 
upper bay of the ship. 

BUCKY
So you'll be on Aldebaran for the entire leave?

JENNY
(paying more attention to her instruments than he is)
Yes. The Queen wanted me to help with ... something very badly.

	An explosion suddenly rocks the ship, setting off numerous 
alarms. Bucky quickly moves to disable them.

BUCKY
(hitting comm-panel)
Toads! Evasive action!

	SCENE SHIFTS TO LOWER BAY

	GUNNER DEADEYE DUCK hops behind his maser canon.

DEADEYE
Never a dull moment, eh, Cap'n?

	SCENE SHIFTS TO UPPER BAY

BUCKY
Not in this lifetime.
(to Jenny)
They're attacking from behind. Bring the ship around so Deadeye can get 
a clear shot.

JENNY
Aye-aye, Captain.

	Jenny plays with the controls, and the Righteous swings around, 
now face to-face with the squadron of toad double bubbles. After a few 
tense moments, the toads are no longer willing to face Deadeye's 
powerful weaponry and targeting skill.

SQUADRON LEADER
Retreat!

	The double bubbles warp out immediately, leaving the sector as 
quiet as it was minutes before they arrived.

BUCKY
(not shaken)
That was quick. They came all the way out to this sector to nip us in 
the tail and run?

JENNY
Maybe they thought they could catch us by surprise.

BUCKY
They almost did. Continue the course for Genus.

DEADEYE
(over comm)
We ain't gonna go after 'em, Cap'n?

BUCKY
Not now, Deadeye. Not unless you want it cutting into your leave.
(thoughtfully)
They had something up their sleeves. Lucky for us it didn't seem to 
play out in their favor.

SCENE 2 - DOCKING BAY, ORWELL STATION 

	The Righteous Indignation enters the bay of this space station, 
which orbits Genus, and comes to rest in a dock. Seconds later, the 
main pressure hatch opens. Deadeye and BRUISER hop out, both out of 
uniform for once. 

DEADEYE
(chuckling happily)
About time! I could be usin' a tall mug o' swampgrass right about 
now. 

BRUISER
And some bananas! 

DEADEYE
Bruiser, ye just spent the last two months eatin' nothin' but bananas.

BRUISER
(pats his stomach affectionately)
I know, but I'm hungry.

DEADEYE
I'll buy ye a banana shake then, if it'll shut ye up fer the rest o' 
our leave.

	Deadeye leads Bruiser off. Jenny also steps out of the hatch, 
stepping down the ramp, but stops when she notices Bucky at the top of 
it.

JENNY
So where are you going, Captain?

BUCKY
(shrugs)
Maybe I'll stick around, get some paperwork done. Make sure Willy goes 
home occasionally.

JENNY
(puts a paw on his shoulder)
You don't think you should get out? Unwind a little?

BUCKY
No rest for the weary.

JENNY
(smiling)
Whoever said that wasn't the captain of the most often-engaged warship 
in the galaxy, Buck.

	Bucky grins.

BUCKY
Maybe I do need a little rest.

JENNY
That's what leave is for. 
(turns to leave)
Now go out and have fun, Captain. 

	Bucky leans on the hatch and watches her leave.

SCENE 3 - THE RIGHTEOUS INDIGNATION, ENGINEERING

	ENGINEER WILLY DUWITT is kneeling beside an exposed panel, 
working hard with a small clipper and a sheet of wires. He only looks 
up when he hears the hatch swing open. It's Bucky, out of uniform. 
Willy is visibly a little taken back by this; he has never seen the 
captain in casual clothes.

WILLY
(goes to salute)
Uh ... hi, Captain.

BUCKY
(gives a half-salute back)
Don't let me disturb you.
(looks)
What are you up to?

WILLY
Just rerouting some wiring, Captain. I'm trying to redirect more power 
to the maser canons and less to the accelerator.

BUCKY
Ah.
(beat)
Are you doing anything for leave?

WILLY
Well ... I can't really go anywhere, because I have to feed my parents' 
cat while they're away ... 
(shrugs)
No. I was just thinking of getting some work done. 

BUCKY
Yeah, I guess so.
(thoughtfully)
You should get out, you know.

WILLY
There's a lot of stuff to do around the ship.

BUCKY
No, really. Did you get that information about the engineer's 
conference on Canis II?

WILLY
Yeah, the Warp Drive Mechanic's Union sends me stuff all the time.

BUCKY
Did you think about going? You could use the opportunity to ... um ...

WILLY
Socialize?

BUCKY
Yes.

WILLY
(grins)
You sound like my parents. 

BUCKY
(raises eyebrows)
You want me to make it an order for you to go?

WILLY 
You really want me to do this, don't you?

BUCKY
Yes, I do. C'mon, Digger'll be there. It's not like you won't know 
anybody. And you'll get the Security Council off your back about the 
accelerator plans for a few days.

	Willy visibly considers.

WILLY
All right ... I'll go tomorrow morning.
(beat)
Where are *you* going?

	Bucky is surprised by Willy's abrupt question and complete change 
of subject.

BUCKY
I don't know yet. But Jenny said I needed to get out.

WILLY
She was probably right. Is she doing anything?

BUCKY
Her presence was requested on Aldebaran.

WILLY
(understanding)
Oh. OK.
(thinks)
You could always go check out Warren.

	Bucky very briefly gets a far-off look in his eyes.

BUCKY
Yeah.
(goes to leave)
Go to bed at a decent hour, OK?

WILLY
What are you, my dad?

	Bucky doesn't answer, except with a grin, as he leaves.

SCENE 4 - BAR, GENUS

	Every kind of mammal and a few amphibians wander around this 
crowded, drinking and talking. 
	Bucky sits with COMMANDER DOGSTAR, who's in a rather disheveled 
uniform, at a small table. In front of both of them are two half-empty 
glasses of an unrecognizable substance, but from the atmosphere of the 
bar and the look on Bucky's face, it's obvious it's intoxicating.

DOGSTAR
(speech very slightly slurred)
So how long is your crew on leave for?

BUCKY
(speech very slightly slurred)
A week. 

DOGSTAR 
(looking around)
They had their own things to do, I take it?

BUCKY
Bruiser and Jenny have family to visit. Deadeye's out with his pirate 
friends, and Willy I kind of had to push out the door, but he's going 
to a conference for engineers on Canis II.

DOGSTAR
No plans, I take it?

BUCKY
Who, me?

DOGSTAR
Well, you're talking to me instead of rushing off somewhere, so yes, 
you.

BUCKY
(shrugs nonchalantly)
I didn't make any. I guess there's some stuff I could do around Genus 
or Warren, but ...

DOGSTAR
Nothing that calls to your immediate attention.

BUCKY
(takes a sip)
No. And everyone seemed to think I should get out, so ...

DOGSTAR
They were probably right. 

BUCKY
I wish they'd been more specific.

DOGSTAR
Bucky O'Hare, the most popular and celebrated hero of the aniverse, and 
you can't find a party to go to on your free weekends?

BUCKY
I guess I work too hard; no one bothers to invite me.

DOGSTAR
There was that event held by the members of the Council ...
(notices Bucky wave it off)
But that would be a little too high-society for you, wouldn't it be, 
Captain?

BUCKY
So how was it?

DOGSTAR
(shakes his head)
A little too high-society. 

	Bucky laughs. Dogstar turns around in his chair, then back to 
Bucky.

DOGSTAR
Say, Bucky, old chap, are you completely oblivious, or have you been 
noticing that hare throwing you looks from the bar?

	Dogstar points in that general direction.

BUCKY
(off guard) 
How long has she been doing it?

DOGSTAR
Since we sat down.

BUCKY
(chuckles)
I'm totally oblivious.

	Bucky takes another sip, glancing at the casually dressed female 
HARE sitting at the bar. She has a beautiful white fur coat and green 
earrings.

DOGSTAR
(expectantly)
Well?

BUCKY
Well, what?

DOGSTAR
Bucky, as an available young hare, it's your personal duty to go buy 
her a drink.

BUCKY
Is it now?
(considers)
I guess I'd better.

	Bucky stands slowly, stretching. He's been sitting in that chair 
for a long time.

DOGSTAR
I won't wait up for you.

	Bucky slowly makes his way over to the bar, leaning on it next to 
the hare. He goes to open his mouth, but she manages to speak up before 
he does.

HARE
Why, hello there. Have I seen you somewhere before?

	Bucky stops.

BUCKY
Um ... if you're asking me personally, I don't think so.

HARE
But I *have* seen you ... I mean, on the satellite feeds. 
(abruptly)
Can I ask you a question?

BUCKY
Can I buy you a drink?

HARE
Which comes first?

BUCKY
The drink.

HARE
Go ahead.
(to bartender)
Orange slip on the rocks.

BUCKY
Um ... same.

	The bartender produces two drinks.

BUCKY
So ... what was your question?

HARE
I'm a little embarrassed to ask this ... but are you Bucky O'Hare?

BUCKY
(blushes a little)
Yes, I am.

HARE
(raises an eyebrow)
You're not lying or anything to pick up girls, right? 

BUCKY
Is that a big thing for green hares to do on Warren now?

	She nods and sips her drink.

BUCKY
(laughs)
No, I really am Bucky O'Hare.

	Bucky produces his ID. She takes a look at it curiously, than 
hands it back to him.

HARE
You're cuter in real life, you know that?

	Again, Bucky blushes.

HARE
(observantly)
You're awfully shy for a space hero.

BUCKY
I don't get out a lot.

HARE
Too busy busting toads?

BUCKY
Exactly.

HARE
So is this just another stop on your ongoing mission?

BUCKY
Actually, I'm on leave for a little while, so I guess you could call it 
an extensive stop.

HARE
Does that make you free tonight?

BUCKY
(smartly)
Do I look like a busy guy?

HARE
You look a lot busier in the news feeds.

BUCKY
Well, I'm trying to relax.

HARE
(runs her paw up his shoulder)
Need any help?

BUCKY
Help would be appreciated, Miss ... um ...

HARE
Shira O'Neil.

BUCKY
... Shira.
(sips)
Nice name.

SHIRA
(smiling)
Thanks.

BUCKY
(glances around for a clock)
What time is it?

SHIRA 
Almost 11.

BUCKY
OK. Hold on.

	Bucky shifts through his pockets and produces a pocket comm-link, 
which he activates.

BUCKY
C'mon, pick up ...

	After a few seconds, a very tired Willy comes over the small 
speaker.

WILLY
(groggily)
Mmm ... whatisit?

BUCKY
Willy, do you know what time it is?

WILLY
Um ... it's late?

BUCKY 
You didn't fall asleep on the panel again, did you?
(not giving the disoriented Willy a chance to respond)
Go home and go to bed, Engineer DuWitt.
(grinning)
That's an order.

WILLY
(mumbles)
Aye-aye, Captain.

	Bucky closes the link, slipping the comm-link into his back 
pocket. He takes a sip of his drink, and as he looks up, Shira laughs.

BUCKY
What's so funny?

SHIRA
It's just cute, that's all. I didn't know you babysat your crew.

BUCKY
Sometimes I have to.
(shrugs)
I gotta watch out for him sometimes, that's all. Kids these days ...

SHIRA
(mock-surprise)
What, I'm no longer considered a kid?

BUCKY
For my sake, I hope not.

	Shira laughs.

SHIRA
I'd bet I'm not that much younger than you, Captain O'Hare.

BUCKY
Why? What are you, twenty?

SHIRA
Your flattering skills are horrible.

BUCKY
I'm serious.

SHIRA
(lopsided-grin)
Twenty-two. And you?

BUCKY
Twenty-four.

SHIRA
See? We're still little rascals. 
(tugs on his arm)
Now c'mon, let's enjoy the fleeting moments of our youth and blow this 
joint.

BUCKY
(sets simoleans down on the table to pay for the drinks)
Is that a proposal, Miss O'Neil?

SHIRA
Only if you say yes.

BUCKY
(smiles)
Yes it is.

	Bucky allows himself to be pulled out of the bar.

SCENE 5 - RIGEL VII

	Another bar, this one much rougher in character and in patrons. 
Most of the mammals are four-armed ducks, specifically pirates. Deadeye 
sits with another pirate, BLACKBEAK, nursing a glass of green 
swampwater, when the female pirate LANEL approaches him.

DEADEYE
(turns around at tap on shoulder)
Hey ... Lanel. Long time no see.

LANEL
Same here. You never call.

DEADEYE
Aye, lassie, I been busy.

LANEL
(smiles and sits next to him)
Too busy for old pirate friends?

DEADEYE
I'm here now, ain't I?
(looks around)
Where's Red Jack? Shouldn't 'e be trailin' along after ye?

LANEL
He had his ... own business to take care of.

DEADEYE
Not out breakin' the treaty, is he?

LANEL 
(cordially)
It ain't yer business if he is or he isn't.
(probingly)
Since when are you the Canard watchdog for the council?

DEADEYE
Don't doubt me like that, lassie, 'cuz I ain't.

LANEL
What? Our tough Deadeye hasn't had his edges smoothed out by Captain 
O'Hare and the Security Council?

DEADEYE
(lifts his glass)
Ye'd better believe it, lass.

LANEL
Prove it.

DEADEYE
(giving her a look)
Got any ideas?

LANEL
Only if you're not worried about upsetting the treaty.

	Deadeye gives a mischievous grin.

DEADEYE
Only upset it if'n we get caught.

LANEL
(with a glint in her eye)
Maybe your spirit isn't broken after all.

SCENE 6 - ENGINEER CENTER, CANIS II

	Willy and ENGINEER DIGGER, the mole engineer from Dogstar's ship, 
The Indefatigable, enter. AFC BLINKY comes up behind. They approach the 
table marked for registration.
	Willy visibly looks uncomfortable, as he often does when he's 
away from the security of the Righteous and its crew. He's nearly a 
foot or two taller than everyone else and tends to stick out like a 
sore thumb due to his style of dressing and his skin. Digger sees this.

DIGGER
Relax, Willy. It's just a bunch of mechanical ... what's your word for 
us?

WILLY
Geeks?

DIGGER 
Right. No one's bothered with how people look since we entered. 

WILLY
(sees a beaver with a pocket protector)
At least some things transcend dimensions.

	Willy gets registered, then goes in another direction from Digger 
to find his room. He is stopped in the hallway by a RACCOON wearing a 
red outfit, who begins talking to Blinky.

RACCOON
(curiously)
Are you an android first class?

BLINKY
(automatically)
AFC Blinky at your service.

RACCOON
(mesmerized)
Awesome. I've never actually seen one of you ...

WILLY
(to Blinky, has reached his room)
Hey! Blinky, you're still a secured android. No talking to strangers.

RACCOON
(notices Willy)
Oh, sorry. I didn't realize he was yours.

WILLY
He's not, officially. But I kinda brought him here, and my captain 
would be pissed if I lost him.
(suddenly realizes his tone)
Sorry, that was rude. You can look at him if you want.

RACCOON
That's OK. I don't want to intrude ...

WILLY
I know. But you can take a look, if you're so interested.

	Willy enters his room. Blinky follows, and so does the raccoon, 
whose attention is totally captured by Blinky. The android opens a 
panel to show him his circuitry, and the raccoon stares at it in 
wonder.

RACCOON
(to Willy)
Did you build him yourself?

WILLY
No, some scientist did, but he disappeared a while ago, before I got my 
job.

RACCOON
Where do you work?

WILLY
On The Righteous Indignation.

RACCON
(realizes)
So *you're* that engineer?

	Willy doesn't quite understand what he means by this.

WILLY
Huh?

RACCOON
(takes his eyes off Blinky for a minute)
I applied for a job as a part-time warp drive mechanic once, because 
their engineer could only come part-time and they had a functioning 
mark-4 photon accelerator on board.
(beat)
Well, applied isn't the word. I didn't quite make it to the ship.

WILLY
You were one of the guys who was knocked out and stuffed in the closet 
by Al Negator, right?

RACCOON
(remembering, ruefully)
The purple sleazasaur.

WILLY
(remembering)
Yeah, that's him.

RACCOON
That was me. 

WILLY
In that case, yes, I'm that engineer.

RACCOON 
(eyes wider)
Than, you're the guy who's developing the mark-5 ...

WILLY
(slightly aggravated)
Why does everyone seem to know about that?!

RACCOON
I take it it's top secret.

WILLY
What else would it be?

RACCOON
Sorry, I ...

	The raccoon goes to leave, but Willy goes to stop him 
apologetically.

WILLY
Sorry, Mr. ...

RACCOON
Ramsay. Ramsay MacLeod.

WILLY
... Ramsay. Willy DuWitt.
(beat)
Anyway, I get a little edgy about the whole thing sometimes. It's 
rather frustrating.

RAMSAY
Why?

WILLY
For one thing, the damn thing's not the easiest thing to design. People 
forget how long it took the engineers on Genus to get from mark-3 to 
mark-4. Second, every stuffed shirt on the Security Council who knows 
about it wants it in their inbox tomorrow morning, but they refuse to 
get me any help, because they're worried about security leaks. 

RAMSAY
Well, I guess I can't blame you for being frustrated. You must have 
every engineer in the aniverse on your back to see copies of the 
design.

WILLY
(grins)
I'm surprised you haven't asked yet, actually.

RAMSAY
Well, I would never get commissioned for that kind of work.

WILLY
Why not? You said you're an able warp drive mechanic. And an engineer, 
too, or you wouldn't be here.

RAMSAY
Yeah, I got a degree at the Institute like everybody else. And I had 
the same temp jobs of everybody else. Which is why I have to fight with 
everybody else for the one or two jobs open right now. But you know 
what that's like, right?

WILLY
(shakes head)
I'm sorry, but I can't. I've never even been to the Institute ... if we 
are discussing the Graham Institute of Technology ... much less 
graduated from it.

RAMSAY
(confused)
Then how did you get a job on The Righteous Indignation?

WILLY
It was an on-the-spot kind of thing. The old engineer was sucked into 
another dimension by a faulty photon accelerator some ten minutes 
earlier, and I was the only one on the ship with enough technical 
knowledge to do anything.

RAMSAY
But if you didn't study at the Institute ...
(curiously)
You're not from around this dimension, are you?

WILLY
(chuckles good-naturedly)
That took you a while. I know, I look like an over-evolved, hairless 
baboon.

RAMSAY
It would have been rude to say anything, but yes, you kind of do, now 
that you mention it ...

WILLY
I'm a human. And I am an over-evolved baboon, sort of. I'm from Earth.

RAMSAY
I don't recognize the name.

WILLY
It's not in this dimension. The United Animals Coalition has virtually 
no contact with it. I'm the one of the only citizens of Earth who knows 
about the aniverse.

RAMSAY
Doesn't that make you kind of lonely while you're here?

WILLY
(thinking about it)
Sometimes. I have friends on the crew. And I have Digger.

RAMSAY
From The Indefatigable?

WILLY
You know him?

RAMSAY
From the Institute, sure.
(looks at watch)
Listen, I think they're starting the presentation in a few minutes. You 
want to pick up some space java before it starts?

WILLY
(warming up)
Sure.

SCENE 7 - HOTEL ROOM, GENUS

	Bucky's hotel room is dimmed for night. There is a muffled 
croaking sound and a prying sound. The hatch creaks open, under the 
force of a crowbar, and light slides into the room as it opens. A 
darkened figure enters carefully. He sees the figures in the bed and 
takes aim.
	Bucky is jolted awake by the sound of the figure firing up a 
maser pistol. Grabbing Shira beside him, he pulls her over the opposite 
side of the bed.

BUCKY
GET DOWN!

	The two hares narrowly avoid the figure's maser fire. Kneeling 
behind the bed, Bucky reaches up onto the dresser and grabs his own 
blaster. He takes aim and fires at the figure, who is hit and stumbles 
back and falls.
	Bucky stands, half-dressed, holding his smoking gun while Shira 
holds onto his lower half.

BUCKY
Don't worry. You have to wake up pretty early in the morning to get the 
jump on ...

	But Bucky is too preoccupied to see another darkened figure 
approach him from behind. The figure knocks him in the back of the 
head, surprising him.

BUCKY
(right before he falls)
... me.

	Bucky falls to the ground, unconscious.

SCENE 8 - CANIS II

	Blinky, Willy, and Ramsay emerge from a crowded conference room.

RAMSAY
What'd you think of the speaker?

WILLY
I don't know. I was asleep past the first two minutes.

RAMSAY
Really? He was talking about some pretty interesting developments in 
android technology.

WILLY
(grins)
That's why I bring him along.
(points to Blinky)
If I miss something cool, he can play it back.

RAMSAY
He's a handy little guy, isn't he?

BLINKY
(salutes)
Android First Class, at your service.

WILLY
(realizing)
You're pretty interested in robotics, aren't you?

RAMSAY
(patting Blinky)
How'd you guess? No, really, I studied it a little at the Institute, 
but I couldn't find a way to make money off of it, so I had to go into 
engineering. 

WILLY
You couldn't get a grant to develop androids?

RAMSAY
Not since the Corneria disaster, no.

WILLY
What Corneria disaster?

RAMSAY
(shocked)
You work with an Android First Class, and you've never heard of the 
Corneria disaster?

	Willy shakes his head.

RAMSAY
Um ... I think you'd better sit down before you hear this one.

WILLY
Sure ...

	SCENE SHIFTS TO WILLY'S ROOM

	The three of them walk into the room. Willy takes a seat on the 
bed.

WILLY
At least, I've never found anything on Blinky's databanks.

RAMSAY
That's odd. Actually, that's not so odd, all things considered.
(sits)
It started about ten years ago, when android technology was the most 
important thing on the market and everyone was developing it. The head 
scientist was this baboon ... I forget his name ... Dr. Wallace, I 
think it was, actually. Anyway, he had a whole lab on Corneria 
dedicated to developing these first-class androids.

WILLY
Like Blinky.

RAMSAY
Like Blinky. Anyway, the guy was a genius. We still don't understand a 
lot of what he did. The problem was he worked alone, to keep his ideas 
secret. There's rumors that he suspected the toads were going to be a 
menace and were desperate to get their fingers on his technology, so he 
made everything a secret, because back then, everyone was still sharing 
things with the toads.
(beat)
We still don't know exactly what happened, but after a while, we 
stopped hearing from him or any of his lab assistants. So the Security 
Council sent an investigative team to check out everything.

WILLY
(totally captivated)
What did they find?

RAMSAY
The place was totally destroyed. All of the lab technicians were dead 
or missing. The file libraries were burned to the ground.
(shaking head)
It was a mess.

WILLY
The toads?

RAMSAY
The robots.

WILLY
(surprised)
*Wallace's* robots? The ones he was designing?

RAMSAY
That's what they think, from the way they found things. The Security 
Council ordered them dismantled ...
(turns to Blinky)
Except for one or two, I guess. There were always rumors that a few 
were unharmed by whatever caused the others to go haywire, and since 
the robots were too developed and important to be dismantled, they were 
reprogrammed and reassigned.

WILLY
That would explain why I've never been able to get the name of Blinky's 
creator from Bucky. He never wants to talk about it.

RAMSAY
Have you ever played with his databases?

WILLY
A few times, to try to get a better speech program running. Blinky 
still speaks mostly in phrases.
(shrugs)
The thing is totally impenetrable.

RAMSAY
You want me to give it a shot?

WILLY
You think you could?

RAMSAY
I majored in robotics. Did you?

WILLY
It's not my strong point, no. Go ahead.

RAMSAY
(reaches for Blinky's back panel)
Easy, fella ...

	Blinky suddenly becomes alarmed.

BLINKY
This humble robot does not authorize tampering ...

	A shock explodes from Blinky's back, running up Ramsay's sleeve.

RAMSAY
*Hey!* Ow!

WILLY
(alarmed, but does not get up)
Blinky! System shutdown, authorization eight-oh-six-nine.

	Blinky immediate shuts down, his eye blacking out and his arms 
slumping at his sides. Ramsay recovers.

WILLY
(concerned)
Are you OK?

RAMSAY
(shaking it off)
Yeah ... I just ... does he ever do that with you?

WILLY
No. 
(thinks)
Wait, yes. He did it a few times, back when I tried to tamper with his 
databases that were from before he was assigned to the Righteous. I 
guess that was what he was figuring you were going to do.

RAMSAY
But ... he's OK to touch now?

WILLY
It might be a little harder to get inside, with everything shut down. 
We'll have to go manual.
(gets up, opens Blinky's back hatch)
You want to get your tools?

RAMSAY
OK.

SCENE 9 - UNKNOWN LOCATION

	Bucky slowly comes to, still dressed in his pajamas, holding his 
head and groaning. He sits up and looks around, recognizing the 
surroundings of a walk-in cargo bay, but nothing else. Standing, he 
tries the hatch, but as he goes for it, a robed figure enters. It's the 
lizard CAMELEOUS, and another lizard GUARD with different horns.

CAMELEOUS
(drawing gun)
So you're awake.

BUCKY
(stepping back cautiously)
So I am. Where am I?

CAMELOUS
Where does it look like you are?

BUCKY
I'd like to guess an oddly decorated health spa, but I'd say that would 
be a bad guess.

CAMELOUS
(hisses)
Your humor is tiring, Captain.

BUCKY
So is this. What do you want me for?

CAMELOUS
What coldblood in his right mind *wouldn't* want you, Captain O'Hare? 
Your head has a high price on the toad market, if you haven't realized.

BUCKY
It's occurred to me.
(thinks)
Wait ... where's Shira? You didn't take her, too, did you? You lousy 
...

CAMELOUS
(raises claw)
Easy, Captain. She is fine ... and she'll stay that way as long as you 
be a good bunny and keep quiet.

	Bucky shuts up.

CAMELEOUS
I knew you'd catch on.

BUCKY
(daringly)
I want to see her.

CAMELEOUS
I don't think she wants to be seen. She's pretty mad at you, you know. 
For getting her into something she didn't deserve to be in.

	Bucky's face falls, then darkens.

BUCKY
When I get out of here, I'm going to wipe your face ...

	Cameleous fires at Bucky's feet, missing them by inches. Bucky 
jumps back.

CAMELEOUS
Don't make me come back here and burn your toes off, Captain 
O'Hare.

	Cameleous leaves, leaving the other lizard to guard Bucky.

SCENE 10 - WILLY'S ROOM, CANIS II

	Willy and Ramsay have their tools spread across the floor, and 
Ramsay is prying with a scanner and a metal plug into Blinky's exposed 
wiring. Willy watches on.

RAMSAY
It's all locked up ...

	Ramsay probes Blinky, causing sparks to fly. Ramsay doubles back, 
only to see Blinky's projector activate, and a hologram of a BABOON in 
a lab coat appears. He does not speak like a baboon; in fact, he has a 
heavy British accent. The quality of the holographic image is poor and 
failing.

BABOON
This is a record ...
(fades out, fades in)
... ing. If you're watching this, then my plan was at least partially 
successful, because this android is in your paws and not mine. That 
means at least something must have happened for you to be probing his 
databanks. My only hope is that this did not end up in toad paws.

WILLY
(wide-eyed)
That's Wallace?

RAMSAY
Yeah.

WILLY
Coooooool.

WALLACE
(continuing)
I would appreciate if you could return him to me as soon as possible. 
My new address should be in the android's databanks, access code three-
nine-oh-five.

	Blinky shuts back down as the recording ends.

WILLY
(confused)
But ... I thought Wallace was ...

RAMSAY
He was one of the missing people. His body was never found.
(excited)
And if Blinky knows how to find him ...

WILLY
What? But what about the conference?

RAMSAY
Forget the conference! Don't you see how important this is?! Dr. 
Wallace is alive, and Blinky can lead us to him!

WILLY
(considers)
Let me call my captain and at least tell him where I'm going. You call 
up the location on Blinky's databanks.

	Willy activates his comm-link and dials up. After he receives no 
return signal, he shuts it down, frustrated.

WILLY
I can't seem to get a response from the captain. I'll have to leave him 
a message.
(thoughtfully)
I wonder where he could be.

SCENE 11 - CAMELEOUS'S SHIP

	Bucky, clearly bored, paces and looks at his guard.

BUCKY
So ... seen any good movies lately?

	The guard does not respond.
	
BUCKY
(sighs and sits on a box)
I suppose it would be useless to ask you if you have a deck of cards.
(shivers)
Or a shirt. I'm freezing here.

	The guard looks mildly concerned but does nothing.
	
BUCKY
You know, I'm not going to be worth much to the toads if I'm a 
popsicle.

GUARD
You'll be worth enough.

BUCKY
Like Cameleous will give you a fair share, anyway.

GUARD
Quiet!

BUCKY
Hey! I gotta keep warm somehow!

GUARD
(sighing)
If I get you a robe, will you shut up?

BUCKY
(rolls eyes)
Now you catch on ...

GUARD
You're sitting on the supply box.

BUCKY
Oh.
(stands)
Excuse me.

	The guard rolls his eyes and goes to pry the box open. Bucky 
knocks him from behind.

BUCKY
Or maybe I'll just take yours.
(beat)
Man, these guys are stupid.

SCENE 12 - ABANDONED PLANET

	A small shuttle lands, with Ramsay in the pilot's seat and Willy 
beside him. They get out, following Blinky, who leads them on.

WILLY
(looking around)
This place is a wasteland.

RAMSAY
Or it appears to be, at least.

	Blinky is unconcerned. He walks a few steps, then activates 
something in his arm. The ground beside him opens, revealing the rock 
that was the terrain of the planet to be fake and a metal staircase 
leading down.

WILLY
(eagerly)
This day just gets cooler and cooler.

RAMSAY
(looks at Willy)
After we're done, you're going to have to explain some terms to me.

WILLY
It's OK; I'm used to it.

	The two follow as Blinky leads them down the stairs. They walk 
into an extensive laboratory, filled with little electronic devices 
fumbling around everywhere, actively engaged in their own projects.
	A large figure steps out of the shadows. It's Wallace, except 
much older and more bent over than the average baboon.

WALLACE
(turns around, his face lighting up)
Splendid. Welcome home, Android First Class.

	Blinky salutes.

WALLACE
Obedient as usual. You always were a good one.
(turns to Ramsay and Willy)
Thank you. I wish I could've taken him with me years ago, but things 
just didn't work out.

RAMSAY
(shocked)
Didn't work out? Your whole lab team was killed!

WALLACE
(nods)
An unfortunate accident. Things didn't go as planned, it seemed. The 
robots really *did* go haywire.

RAMSAY
They were supposed to fake it?

WALLACE
How else could I successfully fake my death and trust to have all of my 
creations willingly dismantled by the scientific community? I didn't 
want any of that information floating around and falling into the wrong 
paws. 

WILLY
(understandingly)
So you faked your death so everyone would leave you alone to create for 
the good of science and not warfare.

WALLACE
Correct, my ...
(looks at him)
What are you, anyway?

	Willy rolls his eyes.

SCENE 13 - CAMELEOUS'S SHIP

	Cameleous sits in his chair, flying his small shuttle. A robed 
figure appears from the back room.

CAMELEOUS
(turning around in his chair)
Did you shut him up already?

BUCKY
(pulls hood off and raises blaster)
You bet I did!

CAMELEOUS
(puts arms up)
Clever one, Captain O'Hare. I figured you'd be a hard catch.

BUCKY
Not quite as hard as you've been. But now that I've caught you, you're 
under arrest for attempted murder, kidnapping, and treason. 

CAMELEOUS
Not this time either, Captain.
	
	Cameleous visibly concentrates, and disappears in a flash.

BUCKY
(bangs on the console)
Dammit! Missed him again! Frelling regen ...

	Bucky is cut off by the sound of banging from a side door. He 
opens it, and Shira stumbles out into his arms.

BUCKY
(holds her)
Shira! Are you OK?

SHIRA
It was horrible! They were nasty, and slimy, and smelled bad ...

BUCKY
Sorry you got dragged into this.

SHIRA
No, really ...
(straightening herself out, smiles)
It's OK. You're the most interesting boyfriend I've had a while.

BUCKY
(blushing a little)
So we're an "item" now?

SHIRA
A what?

BUCKY
It's a term I picked up from someone. I'll explain later.
(sits at console)
I have to contact Genus and tell them I'm OK.

	Bucky activates the visual comm-link. After a few minutes, 
Dogstar's face appears on the screen.

DOGSTAR
Bucky! We've been looking all over for you ever since we found your 
room sacked ...
(notices Bucky's clothes and Shira's appearance)
Ahem! I say. Is this one of those situations I don't want to know 
about?

BUCKY
(in all seriousness)
I'll explain it later, Dogstar. 

DOGSTAR
Right-o. Get your tail back to Genus before the Security Council freaks 
out. Dogstar out.

	Dogstar severs the link.

SCENE 14 - WALLACE'S LABORATORY

	Wallace stands and begins to walk over to a counter.

WALLACE
I suppose I should be polite and offer you two a drink before you leave 
...

WILLY
Aren't you going to complete Blinky's speech program?

WALLACE
It's on my "to do" list, yes.

WILLY
But ... how can you work on him if I take him back home?

WALLACE
This *is* his home, my hairless friend.

RAMSAY
(to Willy)
He wants to keep him, Willy.

WILLY
But ... he works on our ship, The Righteous Indignation!

WALLACE
(unconcerned)
Well, he did, until you returned him to me.

	The consequences of Willy's actions are beginning to set in.

WILLY
But ... we need him to fight the toads! That's what he does! 

WALLACE
I'm sure your fleet would be no less powerful minus one android. I 
didn't design him for warfare, or I wouldn't have given him feelings, 
like my other prototypes.

WILLY
(not agreeing)
But ...

WALLACE
(placing an unsympathetic paw on Willy's shoulder)
If it makes you happy, my boy, you can take one of my battle robots 
home for you on your little ship.
(uninterested)
Now, if you excuse me, I have work to do.

	Wallace walks off, with Blinky. Willy stands there, in disbelief.

RAMSAY
What's the problem, Willy? 

WILLY
I ... he ... he just can't take him!

RAMSAY
Why not? He's his creator!

WILLY
But we were putting Blinky to use!

RAMSAY
He's not a robot for warfare. He was just used that way by the Security 
Council.

WILLY
(shaking head)
He was great for warfare! He was just like a human -- I mean a mammal 
-- with feelings! That's what a soldier should have! Soldiers shouldn't 
be cold and uncaring machines!
(thinks)
At least that's what the captain told me.

RAMSAY
You really think I'm the one you should be telling this?

	Willy catches his drift and runs up to Wallace, who is sitting at 
his workbench. The old baboon looks irritated.

WALLACE
You're a stubborn creature, aren't you?

WILLY
I want Blinky back, sir. I know he's your creation and all, but I need 
him. The Righteous Indignation needs him.

WALLACE
I told you, take another robot. Just another war-mongering Model Four 
should suit you fine.

WILLY
But that's why I need Blinky. Because he's different.

	Wallace sighs tiredly.

WALLACE
I made Blinky different because I wanted an assistant who didn't have a 
robotic personality, mammal or android. All he is is an assistant, and 
that's what I intend to use him for.

WILLY
(thinking fast)
If you need an assistant ...
(points)
Ramsay would be glad to work with you.

RAMSAY
(shocked, trying to present himself)
Ah, I, um ... sir ...

WALLACE
(considers)
A pleasant offer, but I'll turn it down. I like Blinky. He's very 
responsive, and he'll be a wonderful conversationalist when I fix him.

WILLY
(thinking)
Yeah, he is.
(suddenly changes tone)
Blinky. Speech lock eight-five-oh. Authorization lock seven-two.

BLINKY
(in a British accent)
Lemon curry?

WALLACE
(spins around)
What did he just say?

BLINKY
Lemon curry?

WALLACE
Blinky, unlock speech eight-five-oh.

BLINKY
Lemon curry?

WALLACE
(angrily)
UNLOCK SPEECH!

BLINKY
Lemon curry?

	Willy laughs.

WALLACE
(angrily, to Willy)
What did you do?

WILLY
(slyly)
He's a wonderful conversationalist, isn't he?

WALLACE
(to Blinky)
Override code four-five-eight.

BLINKY
Lemon curry?

WALLACE
(getting furious)
*Override!*

BLINKY 
Lemon curry?

	Wallace groans and throws his paws up.

WILLY
(calmly)
Willy, speech unlock, authorization nine-four-oh.

BLINKY
Speech unlocked. This humble android awaits further instructions.

	Wallace turns to Willy, looking beaten.

WALLACE
You're a better programmer than I expected.

WILLY
It wasn't me. It was just my idea. Ramsay here did all the work.

	Ramsay blushes shyly.

WALLACE
Really? 
(interested)
Well, I suppose if I'll have to listen to endless hairless-baboon slang 
if I keep the android around, having a raccoon would be an improvement 
...

RAMSAY
(shocked)
Sir, I ...

WALLACE
Will accept my offer? Good, you can get right to work. 
(turns sadly to Blinky)
Go home, Blinky.

	Blinky looks at him but does not hesitate to return to Willy's 
side. Ramsay runs to him as Wallace turns away.

RAMSAY
Willy, I gotta thank you ...

WILLY
(waves it off)
I'm just happy I got Blinky back.
(hears beeping, pulls out comm-link)
Yes?

BUCKY
(over comm)
Willy? Are you all right?

WILLY
Are *you*? I couldn't reach you.

BUCKY
Neither could I -- you left the conference.

WILLY
It's a long story.

BUCKY
Same here. Come back to Genus as soon as you can.

WILLY
Aye-aye, Captain.

	Willy shuts down the link.

WILLY
Well, I'd better get back, or the captain'll get on my case again.
(grins)
Good luck with your new job. It looks like your boss is really gonna 
work you hard.

RAMSAY
(happily)
I couldn't ask for more. I owe you one, OK?

WILLY
Anytime.

	Willy leaves, with Blinky in tow.

SCENE 15 - GENUS

	Dogstar and Bucky, now fully dressed, walk down a hallway in the 
Security Council building.

DOGSTAR
Good show, old chap. We would have had a lot of trouble getting you out 
of that one.

BUCKY
Well, I walked into it.

DOGSTAR
Yes ... it was funny that he knew where to find you. Maybe the Council 
needs to step up its security measures for off-duty officers.

BUCKY
No one else on my crew was attacked, were they?

DOGSTAR
No. I asked them to report in, just in case. Everyone's fine.

BUCKY
(relieved)
As long as ...

	Bucky is interrupted as Willy and Blinky come rushing in.

WILLY
Captain! You're OK!

BUCKY
You're supposed to be at the conference.

WILLY
I know. I went, honestly.
(quickly)
But then I met Ramsay and he wanted to reprogram Blinky and Blinky 
showed us his creator was still alive so we went to see him but he 
wanted to keep Blinky and we had to reprogram his speech ...

	Bucky holds up his paw.

BUCKY
I'll be happy to hear about it ... later. Catch your breath first.

WILLY
(taking a breath)
Um ... right.

DOGSTAR
Oh, by the way, the intergalactic speeding commission arrested your 
gunner.

BUCKY
(rolling his eyes)
What now?

DOGSTAR
They pulled him over for excessive speeding in Sector Two. Something 
about a pirate race ...

WILLY
He played "chicken" without me?
(pouts, stomps off, muttering)
Why do I always get left out of everything?

	Willy leaves in a huff. Bucky rolls his eyes again. Just then, 
Shira comes running up.

BUCKY
Shira, I ...

DOGSTAR
(grins at Bucky)
I'll leave you two.

	Dogstar leaves and Shira looks at Bucky expectantly.

BUCKY
Shira, I'm ...

SHIRA
... sorry for being an exciting date? You're the only one who's gotten 
me kidnapped, so far.

	Bucky smiles.

BUCKY
What would you think about doing it again sometime?

SHIRA
Maybe minus the kidnapping part.
(kisses Bucky on the cheek)
Give me a call when you get some more free time.

	Bucky rubs his chin, grinning like a moron, and watches her as 
she leaves.

THE END